To whom it might concern:
Yes, I would love to learn how to ruin your life. Could you please send me your vital information so that I may attempt to brainwash you and take all your money and posessions. Please, if you would, send all banking, password, financial, your mother's maiden name, your credit card numbers and expiration dates to the following e-mail account:
You do want me to get rich off your hard earned money, don't you? ABSOLUTELY! I will spend it on hookers and drugs, stereos, muscle cars, Italian suits, I GUARANTEE YOU!
Now how much do you think a great deal like this would cost? $4,999,23987.00? $2576255453835872558796/8769832? NO FUCKIN WAY!! I am willing to offer this tremendous service for ONLY $5,000.00. THATS RIGHT FUCKER!!! One five thousand dollar donation will get you a years worth of imploding crab lice from Crotch-Stink Jessie!
Cram it and go fuck yourself.
-Reverend Speef Narkle