It's all just a complicated game (trumpet those aardvark farts (It's bad bad news (not that I'm stoned right now, but why would that matter (its just that (I've got it bad (plunge in (let it (drop me off in a wheelbarrow next exit please (It's so squeezable (2 farts, extra grease please)

2 Farts, Extra Grease Please

I keep turning my head around to see if someone walked in the room. Someone to listen to soul music with. Whats all the talk about cabbage. Just a plot to make people shit their pants. Prune and coffee diet. Fucklebeefricorns™

I almost forgot what being stoned on good weed was like. Like a friendly wolverine. I can't wait until I'm 64, then I'll get to shit my pants. I just keep telling myself that I'm not a stoner. Some people must just feel that I hate them. The Mack, the difinitive album on reality. This is not your average sentence.

Front of T-shirt.
Two Farts
Extra Grease

Back of T-shirt:
Shit stains all over the bottom.

I've got to wear an ass gasket Monday.

Wear your shit stains on an AssGasket™.

I remember when I drank 14 beers then went to a friends house and threw someones shoe into a tree.

Everyone should wear a T-shirt with a picture of their private parts.

If you're still reading this then I have taken over your mind.

Did a truck of rotten eggs drive into my nose?

Bottle my poo juice.

I'm the kid that was always in the corner reading about scatology.

I can't believe that I used to write in the open.

Quick, call the cops.

The best feeling is this. When you think you lost her. And then you see her. And it is better than ever.

Alcohol is truth syrum for the dumb. What a good excuse for kicking ass. The true free get to pee anywhere. My shoes have pee stains.

Indian Giver; the poo that starts to come out then darts back in.

We kept putting our bugurs on the bottom of this table. BugurTable™

Then one day the parents were rearanging and we got really scared and I cleaned them off.

Pants with half an axe handle coming out the ass.

Smoking crack gives you ESP.

I need to make techno. That will probably be the best way to brainwash everyone.

I Control You: The San Diego Diarreahs

Why do you collect bottles. I don't. Yes you do. I don't. Yes you do. Then make a toilet with a garbage disposal. Maybe I will, I'd love to see those savage blades rip those greasy bastards apart. You would wouldn't you.

My Prediction. Money is going to ruin you.

Flashback Enema