George Bush

I grew up in Texas with GW's daughters. In fact Jenna had a crush on me or something. We lived behind GW for a while and she would fake a strip tease out her bedroom window. I would invite my friends over to egg her on. It was all innocent fun.   In junior high I started hanging out over there cause they had a sweet swimming pool. We would jump off the roof with fireworks shooting out our ass. At least my friend Kyle and I would. The girls would just watch and laugh.   One day after seeing a drug speaker at school assembly, we all went upstairs to raid the medicine cabinet. There was a ton of good shit up there. We found a bunch of Vicotin, which I'm not a big fan of. But better than that we found Doxepin. Crap on a stick! That stuff sent me into a parallel universe. We were all chilling outside in the sun and then it started kicking in. At first I felt like I was sliding across the concrete and then everything started bending and drooping. Barbara's left boob was hanging down to the ground like a gorilla arm and her other one was poking out her back. Kyle's head had inverted and he was trying to sit up but couldn't. Jenna crawled into the house to make some grilled cheese tortillas, quesidillas I guess. The hallucinations were so intense that I was afraid to go in the water. The shit wouldn't go away.   Eventually their dad came home and saw that we had torn into the Doxepin. Jenna had forgotten to put the bottle back. He came downstairs with a horse whip and threatened to tell our parents. Then he disappeared for a while while we came down from our trips. When he came back he was a whole different person. He was talking a million miles an hour and constantly sniffling. I asked how he could catch a cold when it was so hot outside. He just kept talking nonsense, something about a six legged cat and a backpack filled with wooden nickels.   I didn't see much of them after that incident. Kyle and I weren't allowed at their house. By the end of summer they had moved to some farm in central Texas. Next thing I knew that fukram was the president of the U.S.

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